Before you go any further, read this...

Dictionary.com defines a redneck as:

1. an uneducated white farm laborer, esp. from the South.

2. a bigot or reactionary, esp. from the rural working class.

It goes on to say that redneck is A slang term, usually for a rural white southerner who is politically conservative, racist, and a religious fundamentalist. This term is generally considered offensive. It originated in reference to agricultural workers, alluding to how the back of a person's neck will be burned by the sun if he works long hours in the fields.

While I can't say all that fits me to a tee, a lot of it is pretty damn close.

You see, I lost both my parents before I turned 12 years old. I bounced around in a couple of foster homes before moving in with my uncle when I tuned 15. By age 17, I was on my own. I dropped out of school half way through 11th grade so I could go to work full time. Three months after my 18th birthday, I got behind the wheel of a cab for the first time.

I've learned more about life in 28 years in a hack than any philosopher ever could know. I've had multi-million dollar businessmen, celebrities and pro athletes as well as crack whores, drug dealers and murderers in my cab. I refuse to be an airport jockey or one of those guys that only stages at the hotels, so unfortunately, I have to deal with more of the bottom feeders of life than I do the upper crust.

It is the dealings that I've had the bad apples that has made me what I am today...

The Redneck Cabbie.

You see, to escape the madness of the city streets, my mind drifts off (not while I'm driving) to a quiet country town. A place where everyone knows everyone, and a man's handshake is as binding a contract as a person needs. A place where friends gather to down a couple of cold ones and listen to music that you can actually understand the words.

A place where young men don't walk around with their pants falling down over their ass, and young ladies don't have to dress like sluts to draw a man's attention.

I think you get the picture. I know, boring as whale shit to most city folks. I'd be living in a town just like that if it weren't for the fact that there's just not much demand for my line of work in most small towns.

This blog will reflect these feelings. If I seem a little bitter now and then, its just because that wonderful little town is nowhere in my near future, and because the life expectancy of someone in my line of work doesn't extend much past retirement age, all I can do is dream about it.

Tuesday, June 5, 2007

I wrote my Congressman

The following is a message I composed to US Representative, Soloman Ortiz from Texas.

Dear Sir,

For a long time now, I have been strongly against the seat belt law. While I know that it is a state law, I'm pretty sure there is some Federal highway money attached to it. This is why I'm contacting you, as opposed to someone at the state or county level.

You see, I think wearing seat belts is a good idea, one that could save a person from serious injury or death. However, there are many things a person can do to protect themselves, none of which are law.

It is my opinion that laws were supposed to be made to protect people from each other, not from themselves. Sorry for sounding morbid, but while there is a law against murder or attempting murder, there is no law against attempting suicide to my knowledge.

Car seats for children are another story. Kids at that age are not old enough to make a decision like that for themselves.

I understand the insurance lobby is one of the most powerful in Washington. I share a common belief that they are the ones that have pushed this law and are the driving force behind this whole "Click it or Ticket" crap we have to listen to during every holiday. I would be more inclined to buckle up if Geico just sent me a letter saying they would not pay for my personal injuries if it was determined that I was not buckled up at the time of my accident.

So instead of patrolling the streets these last two weeks, trying to get a handle on our increasing drug and gang problems, or just watching out for these lunatics that drive 100 mph down SPID (I guess most of them are buckled up, so they're ok) our local law enforcement lurks in the underpasses, with one cop that looks like a homeless guy with a home made sign telling us to "Click it or Ticket," while his buddies are shooting fish in a barrel handing out tickets.

Yes, I was one they caught. I am driving on these local streets for as many as 75 hours a week. The odds of getting stopped just caught up with me. Although this is my first seat belt ticket in 26 years of professional driving.

Sir, I am generally a law abiding citizen. I'm not some whacko that flies off the handle at every stupid little thing. This is the first time I've ever "written my congressman."

I don't think there's a chance in heck of repealing the seat belt law. Most folks think it's a good idea and buckle up out of habit. I just think it's a matter of priorities, and no taxpayer money should be used to fund "stepped up enforcement" campaigns when there are many other more serious problems in our communities.

All I'm asking for is that law enforcement protect me from the bad guys, not from myself.

Respectfully submitted,
John Shannon

Problem is, his website is not working and the "send" button wont let me send the message.

HMMMMMM......

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